KEEP LEF'

Driving on STJ is a different experience because you drive on the left. No one is sure why. One story goes the donkeys were brought here from Denmark and England where, thanks to right handed sword wielding knights, they rode on the left side and refused to change. And let's clarify this: it's not the "wrong side" it's the other side. If you're on the right side YOU are on the wrong side, so get back on the correct side, which is the left side! 

However it is, it just is and so we keep lef'. It's a cultural ting.

But there are more driving nuggets to be aware of. The good news is, unless you're a water truck, it's almost impossible to go faster than 25mph, so whatever happens will happen slower. There are a lot of vehicles here with right front fender damage and hanging right rear view mirrors -oops - dangling like a plucked eyeball from its socket. Duct tape is a popular automotive must-have.

There are no traffic lights on STJ. There was one but it's sitting in storage somewhere. No one wanted it.

There is one straightway. Floor it. If your car backfires and has no muffler, even better. It's the only chance you'll ever have to experience the thrill of speed, going from 20 to 50.

Let's start with the yellow line in the middle of the road. What is this? It's a suggestion, straddle it. What's all this about "two lanes"? Lanes are for the WEAK! If the yellow line is on a curve it has even less meaning.

George likes to play "chicken". He will use up his whole side (notice I didnt say "lane") and not move over for the centerline drivers. He likes to make THEM move over. I don't ride with my elbow out the window.

Speaking of which, you also get a reverse farmer-tan. Your left arm is the one that gets the sun. 

If someone is on your tail, like really on your bumper, he isn't being rude, he's communicating. You're supposed to pull over and let him pass. He'll honk his horn in thanks. 

Isn't it ironic that the main road across the island is called "Centerline Road"?

fig 1.

 This driver is not quite up to centerline travel (fig.1) .  Though its impossible someone could be coming around the corner from the other direction he's playing it safe and staying lef'.

fig.2

 Now this is more like it (fig.2). Nice style, better straddle definition. We really aren't sure what he'll do or how fast he will react if something comes around the curve. Like a water truck, or a tourist on the wrong side of the road.

It is totally acceptable when a road follows the curve of a hillside to ignore the curves and take the straightest line from point A to point B as in the blue dotted line of fig. 3. It could save you 1o seconds getting to the rum!

fig.3

                                                                                                                             

fig.4

The water truck (fig.4) at Telephone Pole Corner. He's barreling around the corner blaring his horn in true water truck style. Nothing will stand in his way. An aside to this story is the telephone poles. There is always a stockpile of poles here, thus the name. Why is this? As he comes around this curve he'll hit a steep hill . At the bottom of this hill is the Reef Bay Trail, where hikers are hanging around and people are parked with doors open. Oh joy! We're having fun now!

On top of this, we have donkeys in the road, chickens (more often collateral damage), pigs, and Mr. Moses' herd of wandering cattle. There are microphoned taxi drivers narrating tours and stopping in the road to point out the scenery - "here we have a cotton plant...." . Then you get to PASS BLIND. There's the bus, way too big for the road, a behemoth, but the drivers do a good job, they don't hit anyone, people hit THEM. It was actually a short period of time before people understood how to use the first and only traffic circle, though some people still drive across the middle of it. You think the trash bins left there at the "MILE 0" sign will help?

But isn't this fun? The worst shape your car is, the more fun it is. Anyone can rent an SUV , shut the windows, turn on the AC, stay within the line and play it safe. You'll still have to watch out for Mr. Moses' pigs.